Notes from the night shift

Prepping Khalid for bed= pajamas, diaper change, warm milk.

Prepping me= cup of coffee and two extra-strength aspirin.

12:40 am, and the bedtime battle is well underway.

posted by Abez @ 5/05/2008 12:31:00 AM
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The Bebefiles: Things Khalid may be up to when it's too quiet and you haven't seen him for the last minute or so

Splashing around in the toilet

Eating vaseline

Hammering on the computer chair (with a real hammer)

Hiding behind the curtains with his father's phone

Opening and closing the CD drive on the laptop repeatedly

Eating laundry soap with a toy spoon (but apparently giving up after just a taste)

Drinking dishwashing liquid (and then throwing up on the kitchen floor)

posted by Abez @ 4/30/2008 06:35:00 PM
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Ma-Ma?

So Khalid still doesn't talk. At all. He doesn't even say Mama. I mean, he does say things like akichigaa and gagin-gagin and mamamamamamaaaaaaa, but nothing with meaning and context.

I'm not worried about his development, just impatient to be able to communicate with him. All of the recommendations about helping ease sibling rivalry and smoothly introducing a new baby to your toddler involve communicating with your child and getting them to help you care for the baby. Multiple mothers, including all you lovely people in my comment box (I apologize for not being able to reply most of the time) recommend the same thing- let your toddler help and the problem will resolve itself.

I completely agree, but 'please bring me the powder' is about as meaningful to Khalid as akichigaa is to me. We're not speaking the same language, and I know he gets frustrated trying to communicate what he wants. I end up handing him everything on the dining table only to find out he wants something from the window-sill behind it.

So how do you involve a non-verbal toddler in caring for a newborn? As it is right now, Khalid probably thinks his sister's name is Gently. He approaches her, raises his hand, and is greeted with "Khalid jaan, gently. Gently... no whacking! Pat her gently, gently!" I wouldn't be surprised if it was his first word, heh.

Ah well, Iman is doing well Alhamdulillah, and seems happy and amused at things in general when she's awake. Alhamdulillah that newborns spend so much time sleeping, it gives me time to lavish some attention on Khalid when I'm not running after him and trying to put the house back together in his wake.

Gots to go, both kids are asleep and their mother needs a shower.

Over & Out,
Abez & Tribe

Labels: BebeFiles, Mystery Bean Chronicles

posted by Abez @ 4/19/2008 05:49:00 PM
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A toddler, a Newborn and a Paradigm Shift

Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah. We’ve been home a week and Iman is healthy, happy, and adorable in the squashy, pink, surprised-looking way that newborns are so good at. Khalid, on the other hand, is having a rough time, as we seem to have brought home fierce competition for his Momma’s attention.

When I change Iman’s diaper, it’s with Khalid trying to push me away from the changing station. When I nurse her, her tries to pull her out of my lap, and when she cries, he puts his hands over his ears and starts crying too. They take turns waking up throughout the day and night- Five minutes into Khalid’s nap, Iman woke up. An hour and a half later, Iman went back to sleep. Half an hour after that, Khalid woke up. So we’ve had a rough week, but we’re learning how to cope.

I am determined not only to cope though, but to succeed. Succeed at what? Ah, now there’s the paradigm shift- a paradigm shift being a radical change of perspective- The standard of a productive, successful day once included a clean house, a freshly-cooked meal, a well maintained toddler and at least two hours of work. But that was the standard for Abez and Khalid. The standard for Abez and Khalid and Iman involves a house, a meal, and two alive children.

Work is not a possibility.
Getting dressed is optional.
Lunch today was peanut butter.

So, according to the new standards, we’re not doing half bad! Look, we’ve even found a little time to write a blog! (Iman is asleep, Khalid is being fed breakfast) We’ve also found time to dig out our box of pre-maternity wardrobe, try things on, and then be both horrified and amazed- (Horrified that we seem to be so very far away from buttoning anything, amazed that we were able to just a few months back.)

But I digress- it’s been a bumpy ride, but we’re moving forward Alhamdulillah.

Labels: BebeFiles, Mystery Bean Chronicles

posted by Abez @ 4/10/2008 10:55:00 AM
7 comments links to this post

Alhamdulillah- The Mystery Bean Arrives!

Lil Naughty Baby Girl Iman has arrived, Alhamdulillah. 3.7 kilos, 11 days after her due date, and 1 day before she was scheduled for eviction.

Will update more shortly, have not yet opened my mailbox.

Zzzz

posted by Abez @ 4/02/2008 09:48:00 PM
9 comments links to this post

RUN AWAY!!!!

So I spent another night in the hospital, as the doctors tend to recommend that you do when you're in early labor. And then we escaped. And then today we went back for our CTG appointment, and the doctors again said, you're in early labor and strongly recommended we stay. And you know what we said? RUN AWAY!!!! I live ten minutes from the hospital, and if I'm going to languish in the labor twilight zone, I'm going to languish here at home!

Yes, I am in early labor, no, we have no idea how long this could take. Technically, I've been in early labor since the 23rd. I feel immense, and today the consultant who saw me asked the nurse if I was carrying twins. No, no twins, just one very stubborn little baby!

Khalid spent the weekend with HF's parents, who have been both delighted and exhausted to have his crazy-pants company. HF has gone to retrieve him now, and when he returns, we will finish watching Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind. HF bought me the entire Miyazaki collection so I have stuff to watch in the hospital. As usual, HF is my hero. :)

They'll be back soon, so I need to go straighten up while I still can and then get some food ready for Khalid. Keep us in your prayers, and in the mean time, have some Monty Python.

posted by Abez @ 3/29/2008 08:47:00 PM
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Hooray for Baskin Robbins

And for HF who brought me a whole gallon of Dutch Chocolate to begin with.

We're home from two nights in the hospital, but we still seem to be pregnant. *checks enormous stomach* Yep, definitely still pregnant. In what may be a perfectly normal but seriously frustrating experience in childbearing, we've been in early labor two days now, nothing overly painful, all systems basically go, but no active labor to push Mystery Bean into making his/her debut.

The nurses told me to walk, so I walked. And when that didn't work, I raced HF up the hospital stairwell, and then we walked some more. I've spent two nights and two days walking around the hospital, and finally the doctors gave in to my insistence on going home. I figured if I am going to walk and wait, I might as well in the comfort of my own house with a bowl of my own ice cream.

Today we are Term + 6, which is the medical way of saying this baby should have been out six days ago. If I'm still pregnant by T+8, then I have a scheduled induction waiting for me, which is the medical way of saying that this baby is going to be served an eviction notice!

It's been an interesting experience, but I will blog more about it later. There's a nap with my name on it, and I'm going to go fall into it face-first.

posted by Abez @ 3/26/2008 03:46:00 PM
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InshaAllah

So apparently I did get to attend the henna and the wedding, and now that we're done running amok all over the emirates, we may have some good news shortly InshaAllah.

;)

posted by Abez @ 3/23/2008 01:29:00 AM
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The waiting game

If I just *pretend* that the baby is due this weekend, maybe I can attend the two weddings and two henna parties I've been invited to in the next two days, starting today. Right! Okay! Off we go, to a mehndhi!

(If anyone needs me, I'll be the guest that looks like a cannon ball in an abaya!)

posted by Abez @ 3/20/2008 12:25:00 PM
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Post number 600: A note on zombies...

Yes, this really is my 600th post, and yes, it really is going to be about zombies.

I used to play video games, and for some odd reason, that involved fighting alot of zombies. I'm not sure why the manufacturers of these games are so caught up in vanquishing zombies- it's not like the real world has a serious undead infestation and as art imitates life, so must gaming. But, I understand why the zombies and not, say... the commies. Zombies are non-political, non-trademarked enemies that everyone understands and no one can really be offended by. Also, they're scary.

Way too scary, for people like me apparently, who have not played any zombie-themed video games for years but still find themselves hosting zombie-dreams at night. Which is why, Khalid, Mystery Bean- you guys are only getting adorable video games with adorable non-dead enemies. And no blood. Or gore. Or eating of peoples' faces.

I never thought I would be one of those uptight parents, but I fully expect to have both Khalid and Mystery Bean whining at me in a store about why they can't buy BloodBath of the Starving Undead in the Castle of Carnage- The Sequel! (Director's Cut: Now with more gore!) And I'm not sure how to go about convincing them that violent, gory video games will rot their brains, apart from providing my own example.

(We are not buying you that horrible game!)
(But Momma, why not?)
(It'll give your momma nightmares!)

I suppose I'll just have to explain it to them as best as I can and provide non-gory alternatives until they're old enough to believe me. It seems dramatic and ridiculous, but there are still certain sounds, certain shadows- certain little creaks that stairs make- and all of a sudden I'm Jill Valentine, Leon, or Aya Brea, and I'm alone in the dark with no ammo, none of that magic first-aid spray, and no chance of surviving the onslaught.

So yeah. No zombies for Khalid and Mystery Bean.

And speaking of Mystery Bean, today is his/her due date, and no show! What gives! I know the 19th is only halfway over (it's noon) but come on kid! Get out already! My account at babycenter.com, which has sent me week-by-week email on pregnancy for the last 40 weeks, has already switched over to newsletters for newborns!

Mystery Bean is late!

posted by Abez @ 3/19/2008 12:32:00 PM
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The Husbandfiles: My Hero :)

I have nightmares pretty often these days as my sleeping brain tries to make its own explanation up for why we're in pain. Though the real reason is full-term pregnancy, my brain thinks it's zombies. Our stomach hurts not because we have indigestion, but because the zombies got us. Our legs hurt not because of poor circulation, but because the zombies are chewing on them. If our arm hurts, it's not because we have it wedged uncomfortably against the headboard- not unless the zombies did that for us too.

So I woke up this morning, a lil disoriented and scared and shaken (yep, zombies) and hearing a sound from outside the bedroom, ran out hoping it was HF and not merely zombies using his toothbrush. HF, seeing the look on my face as well as what the zombies probably did to my hair in the middle of the night, immediately understood and did what he always does- he rescued me. :) We had a hug and two chocolate cookies and watched the trailer for Wall-E, by which time the zombies were old news. We woke up Khalid, tickled him until he looked less groggy, and then sent HF on his merry (and InshaAllah safe) way to work.

I love HF. I can't say that often enough, really. The other day, when I called him on the phone and demanded something chocolate, he came back with four packs of chocolate cookies and half a gallon of Baskin Robbins.

Midnight a few days before that, as I was going on my third half-hour of trying to battle Khalid to sleep, HF burst suddenly through the darkened bedroom door (ran back to turn on the lights, and then burst in again) to inform me that he was here to rescue me. Bebeface stopped caterwauling, HF gave me a hug, and then we did my favorite thing in the world- we unpacked boxes and cleaned the house. :) Two hours later, with the house clean and Khalid too exhausted to put forth resistance, we went peacefully to bed.

Alhamdulillah. JazakAllah. SubhanAllah.

HF, you are the awesomest.

Labels: HusbandFiles

posted by Abez @ 3/13/2008 11:07:00 AM
5 comments links to this post

test post

testing?

posted by Abez @ 3/12/2008 05:41:00 PM
4 comments links to this post

Attention Nature: Khalid bites back!

I *was* about to put all three of us (Khalid & Mystery Bean and I) down for a much-needed nap, except we experienced a slight detour on the way to the bedroom, where Khalid discovered, and promptly attempted to eat, a live beetle.

And I, in all the grossness that is being the Momma of a little boy, reached in and pulled the live beetle out of his mouth.

And Khalid ran away and threw a tantrum in a corner by the bathroom.
(my snaa-aaa-aaaaack! bwaaaa-haaaaa-haaaa!)

And the beetle got back on its feet and resumed its wobbly journey across the living room carpet.

And I went for the vacuum cleaner.

I'll feel sorry for the beetle later. Right now I'm grossed out. And sleepy.

-zonk-

posted by Abez @ 3/05/2008 02:14:00 PM
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Nature: IT's OUT TO GET ME!

First of all, a word about the bees. After my last post, I crawled into bed, pulled the covers up to my ears and went to sleep. I woke up about an hour later with HF tucking the blankets around me and and whispering, "There are no bees, shhh, go back to sleep."

I drifted off to sleep thinking- my hero! and snoozed happily for another half an hour.

When I properly woke up, around Asr time, HF and Khalid were both still asleep, so I figured I'd get up and go on a tour of my now bee-free house. In the living room, there were two dead bees on the window sill, and in the kitchen, around six or seven. I was a bit surprised, since when I went to sleep I really, literally had dozens and dozens of bees, and the idea that only a handful had fallen in HF's anti-bee offensive seemed a little odd, but I was happy to have such a minor clean-up job.

Now, imagine my surprise when HF woke up and clarified that his statement of "There are no bees," did not actually mean "There are no longer any bees because I, your brave and wonderful husband, have killed them all. Sirrah." It actually meant "There aren't any bees there. Because I can't find any, my adorably kooky wife. "

For two days HF teased me about InvisiBees. And then I found one last dead bee in the living room and I saved it for him and showed it to him, but it hasn't made much of a difference- he thinks it's the funniest thing ever, and I have to admit- it's seems ridiculous to have an invasion of bees, call for reinforcements, and then suddenly not have an invasion anymore. Where did they all go? Why did they up and leave? And why did they leave a whole bunch of dead bees behind? Political infighting? Bee gang violence?

It doesn't end there. Yesterday, my purse was full of ants. Hundreds of ants. And I wore said purse, and said ants, to the car, and when I put my purse down on the seat, it rained ants. And there were ants in my clothes, and ants in my wallet, and ants other places where one never, ever wants ants (like in one's chewing gum).

I gracefully and calmly exited the car (hooray for artistic license), threw my purse on the floor, shook off my clothes and raged at the ants for a while. Then I picked my purse up with the two smallest parts of two of my bravest fingers, and shook it out onto the floor- money, pretzel sticks, gum, phone, wallet... everything crawling with ants whose take on the entire eviction seemed to be "RUN FOR IT!"

I shook off the few items I considered essential (I had been on my way to pick up HF from work, and was already running late) cash, phone, keys- and took my indignant self and all of my heebie-jeebies back to the car, where we swatted ants off the seats and floor mats for a while before heading off, 20 minutes late.

Half-way home again, after I had already narrated my misadventures, complete with dramatic reenactment and insistence on a new purse (and a new car, and maybe a new house), the ants that had started out on the floor had made it to the ceiling, and two of them dropped onto HF while one of them plodded admirably along, upside down towards the windshield.

The good news is, HF believed me.

The bad news is, we seem to have an ant problem.

The conciliatory news is, I get a new purse.

By Abez. The End.

posted by Abez @ 3/02/2008 09:57:00 PM
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An Update from Behind Enemy Lines

I saw Bee Movie last night, but that doesn't make me feel any better right now- the kitchen and living room have been invaded by bees.

A whole. lotta. bees.

You will notice that every word in the above sentence has been italicized for emphasis. Whole has been emphasized in conjunction with Lotta, to accurately convey the dozens and dozens of big, fat, bees buzzing around my kitchen, crawling on the counters, partying in the trash can and banging their heads against the window that isn't open. Bees has been italicized to emphasize that in addition to being many, the invaders are also Bees of all things. Ants are tolerable, moths are annoying but harmless, flies are well within manageability, but bees?

(Why couldn't I have been invaded by squirrels? At least squirrels are cute, and I'd rather be bitten than stung.)

I suppose it's my fault for opening a window on this lovely, sunny, breezy day, but by the same logic, it will be the bees' own fault for being on the wrong side of that window when HF gets home to rescue me! He's bringing bug spray! My Hero! Take that, bees!

Also, the movie stunk.

-sigh-

Oh hey, we have internet now! Alhamdulillah, as of this morning, a nice man from Etisalat came and set up the DSL line. Granted, he came at 9:30, and if he had been anyone else I would have turned him away at the door for showing up at such an ungodly hour. Trust me, 9:30 is very, very early when you have:

-gone to bed at 1 the night before
-woken up repeatedly throughout the night w/a sick, screamy toddler
-the flu

HF, Khalid and I are all out of commission w/the flu, and now, in addition to my lil home being a quarantine unit, it's also a battlefield. The reinforcements are still many minutes away, and they still have to stop at a store and buy bug spray before they get home, so further hooray for DSL. Now I have something to do while I hide here in the bedroom and wonder if bees know how to crawl under doors.

On a non-invasive note, Baby 2.0 is doing fine, kung-fu'ing as usual, trying to push my ribs out of the way and trying to defensively wiggle away from Khalid, who thinks my enormous stomach is a great place to climb, drive toy cars on, and try to sleep on. I have officially run out of lap, and am at week 36.

It's 1:45 now, and I guess lunch is on hold until the kitchen is reclaimed. HF should get home soon, I think I'm going to lay down and see if I can catch a few min of zzz's before he does.

Peace & Chikken Grease
-Abez & Co.

posted by Abez @ 2/25/2008 01:23:00 PM
7 comments links to this post

There's a Ninja Turtle on my grill

It's Donatello, actually, and I believe he was a Happy-Meal gift from Bebe's crazy aunt, Owlie. I noticed that this morning, as I was microwaving Khalid's cereal, and HF's matter of fact reply was, "Of course, he's keeping it safe."

Which brings me to an interesting realization- I, Abez, am nearing 28, am the mother of 1.9 children (Mystery Bean is due in abt 3 weeks) and the maintainer of my own lil house, and it is guarded by Ninja Turtles. And populated with a thriving community of boxes. And stocked with things like granola bars and frozen strawberries and four different kinds of cereal. And I have wall to wall carpeting, and one sofa, and no dining table, and no phone and no internet access, but my cabinets are meticulously organized, except for the ones where I have crammed things in and then closed the door real fast so things don't topple back out.

I am One. Weird. Adult.

Also, I am nine months pregnant, Alhamdulilah, and getting to that point in pregnancy where I'm running out of space for things like eating, breathing, and maneuvering through doors. Mystery Bean will be due soon, InshaAllah, and sad but true, that will mean even less blogging. I'm trying to not feel guilty about that, since my primary obligations seem to belong mostly to my lil tribe. :)

Speaking of whom, the natives are getting restless, and are heading my way with a spatula in one hand. Time to save and publish before all is lost in the ambush.

posted by Abez @ 2/15/2008 05:19:00 PM
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Blog in a bottle-

I tell you, first-born kids have all the luck- Khalid got the Bebefiles and there may be at least a dozen entries devoted to him, but Mystery Bean not only has only the faintest of mentions, but is also frequently bounced up and down on by Khalid, who either has zero idea what's going on, or every certainty that competition is coming, and is doing his best to squash it early.

People have asked me whether Khalid seems to be reacting to the great, huge bump in my shirt. Well, he does like to drive his toy cars on it, but that's about it. Umm, and he likes to pet my stomach too, but this recent development isn't limited to me- he will reach up his HF's shirt and feel around there, and up my pants legs too, and any opportunity he can get to touch and poke bare skin he will take, regardless of whose it is.

We're still on borrowed internet time, so I must cut and run, will try to update more soon-

Queen Abez of Boxville

posted by Abez @ 2/08/2008 08:36:00 PM
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Two minute update

AssalamUAlaikum and hello in fastforward-

an in net cafe with stick keyboard -chocolate icecream or something apaperntly- and we're doing good, but the internet may be weeks away. Finally havee running fridge, washing machine and stove, life is good Alhamdulillah and I have so much laundry accumulated that I've started hiding it in the packing boxes as I empty them :p Seriously. But at least we have home-cooked food, SubhanAllah, because I had Popeye's the other day for the first time in my life and am not suer why anyone would eat that voluntarily but ONE MINUTE OF NET TIME LEFT!! GAAAH!

Peace & Chikken Grease,
Live from the Gas Station,
-CRACKERS!

posted by Abez @ 1/25/2008 02:30:00 AM
2 comments links to this post

T-minus ten hours and counting...

The movers will be here in ten hours, to box, bubble-wrap, and tape shut our worldly possessions and ship them to the new place which, at the moment, has neither internet nor a fridge :p The fridge is coming on Sunday InshaAllah, the internet is coming when Etisalat says so.

Incidentally, I own too much stuff again, but that is another blog for another unknown day. Please make dua for us, moving plus being 31 weeks pregnant (the beginning of month 8) as well as the keeper of a tantrumariffic toddler is physically taxing as well simply stressful.

Catch y'all on the flip side!

-Abez & Co.

posted by Abez @ 1/19/2008 01:00:00 AM
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Updates all around

Update number 1: we know the gender of the mystery bean! hahahahahaaaa!! And if you know me well enough to have my phone number or email address, I'll tell you! But if not, you can wait until the end of March to find out! hahahaha!

Update number 2: We're in the process of moving to a place closer to HF's work, so computer (as well as leisure) time is little and lacking. The good news is, HF will now have half an hour of commute instead of an hour and a half of commute (we're talking one way here folks), and I'm really looking forward to having him around again. :)

Update number 3: Sleep training is continuing in some form or another, with mixed results, but I haven't the time to go into detail, cuz this fat tired pregnant blogger needs a nap.

By Zeba the end.

posted by Abez @ 1/07/2008 04:50:00 PM
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